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Until my daughter was five and learned how other children behaved, she was perpetually in pink and white, dainty, and always spotlessly clean, leading many to seriously question her parentage. She was also, unfortunately, quite articulate.

When she was four years old visiting her grandmother, she picked up an object from the coffee table, looked at my mother in law quizzically and said, quite clearly,

“So what the f*** is this?”

There is a special category of hell hearing this story from your mother in law.

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